This week has been really rough so far, emotionally. (Things are improving physically, thank goodness.) On Monday Spencer and I went to his school for a couple of hours to check things out and prepare ourselves (me) for next week. Of course I know this is going to be hard, but I never realized how powerful the feeling would be. Mommies are just not programmed to hand their babies over to someone else and walk away. Monday morning (shortly before lunchtime) yielded a bunch of cranky toddlers and left me feeling a little unsure of our decision. (Carol confirmed that, as a teacher, Monday mornings are particularly tough on little children.) But Jim and I returned on Wednesday morning to find a more even atmosphere in the room. And we went back later that day to meet the afternoon staff and found it to be calmer and even more organized at that time of day. This times out great for Spencer's schedule, as he often doesn't wake up from his morning nap until around 1:00.
It's also been rough because we suspect that Spencer may be coming up on his three-month growth spurt. After managing to bank about 40 ounces into the freezer in the span of about two weeks, suddenly I am having trouble satisfying Spencer's appetite in the evenings. It's frustrating for me, and not altogether comfortable either, to have him want to nurse for the entire evening. Yesterday he didn't take an afternoon nap of any kind, except for occasionally passing out for 10-15 after a bit of nursing. The book I ordered to learn how to effectively put your baby to sleep arrived yesterday and I poured over it immediately. "Solve Your Child's Sleep Problems" was recommended very highly in "Baby 411" The first few chapters have already given me a much better understanding about the science of sleep. With that, the approach on how to teach babies to go to sleep is entirely logical. Unfortunately, young babies are neurologically immature and unable to calm themselves down (why infants require swaddling) so we are still unable to put these techniques into practice just yet. Which is why Spencer continues to spend many overnights in the swing.
Tomorrow I plan to leave Spencer at school for a couple of hours, so I can burst into tears somewhere other than work! Perhaps I'll finally make it to DSW to get some new shoes for my return to work.